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Thursday, December 31, 2009

i hate weddings

I know.

I know I am unreliable when it comes to the past two years' social engagements. I know I hate weddings and I always turn truant in attending them because, really, what can be more irritating than talking to 'old acquaintances' at a table of ten or twelve with whom socialising can be really, really tiring for anyone, let alone a clinically-depressed and unwell person. I know I hate babies, I know I hate making small talk with anyone except strangers, I know I hate having to answer 'How are you doing now?' and 'What are you doing (with your life) now?' questions.

But this recent hen-party I am planning for one of my very few best friends in the world, has gotten me peeved. I have two last minute not-coming replies, in the very week that the event is happening. Could they have told us any later that they are not coming?

This is the last hen-party I am ever organising, and hopefully the last wedding I will ever attend. Till the very day I die, I don't ever want to witness another sign-your-names / champagne pouring ceremony. Enough is enough.

I really hope I don't start on sarcastic, caustic, quarrelsome remarks when I meet these two girls who are suddenly not appearing for what is their good friend's last ever party as a singleton. I wish I could skip the wedding so I can avoid seeing these 'bridesmaids'. Bridesmaids indeed! What bridesmaid fails in her bridal shower duties?! Unreliable bitches! Unless you have cancer, or some other kind of debilitating excuse which renders you unable to get out of bed, then there simply is no excuse for such behaviour. I certainly hope these same 'bridesmaids' will decide to not attend the wedding itself because I have no idea how angry I will be if I were to see them in person.

Please don't ever, ever, ever invite me to any more weddings. I hate weddings. All my best friends are already married, anyone else is really not important to me. I will say yes to going but I will not ever turn up at your so-called big day. Big day for you maybe, but everyone is getting married, you are nothing special at all.

Take that, unreliable bridesmaids.