Friday, October 23, 2009
feeling better! in more ways than one
I have taken to going to bed right around 6 p.m. these past two evenings. Exhausted from teaching, and before that, exhausted from waking up. It could be because I hadn't been sleeping well.
I haven't been sleeping well because my headaches have been keeping me up, and consequent lack of rest probably made them worse. Also, Panadol Extra contains caffeine. And because I have been eating so much Panadol, I cut back on my anti-depressants, and was in a sullen, lacklustre, dull and tired mood for much of the week. I am now back on them properly, and am full of energy: today I spent much of my daytime helping a friend at his shop, and I apparently was caught in the act singing while I worked. I think that people who sing while they work are generally happier.
I was also very excited after my 6 p.m. 'nap' last night and instigated J to come with me for a walk around the neighbourhood at close to midnight. Then I went to Shop and Save in the middle of the night to buy groceries (hooray for 24-hour shopping) and even suggested us going to Mustafa just now at about 11pm. A little bit too much hyper, but I guess I ought to have had it coming for me since I skipped my meds for a few days; re-uptake inhibitor bull run.
A new challenge has come to me. Well, more than just one new challenge. Firstly, I need more money. My parents are wiping my debt-slate clean for me because they have come into some money. But after the slate is clean I am pretty much going to be on my own. Mine and J's income together don't make a lot, and while his career is progressing, I need to find more freelance work. Otherwise we will still always be skint. And I can never afford that Georg Jansen ring
I want to buy for him. Or a new computer. Computers. Right now I would be happy enough to have enough money just to survive, and maybe allow me to re-stock on my skincare. Yes, I have been that
Another challenge would be my volunteer work. Ever since The New Paper coined our cat blog
as 'animal rescue group Ubi Kuching Project', (see picture below), we have become a tad more high-profile than just a bunch of animal lovers mucking around. To sustain our work, we need to sustain our resources. This in other words means fund-raising. Which is my forte in a way, and a step towards doing fund-raising and resource allocation for bigger charitable causes which is still my life's dream. I am taking this project in my stride.
But I proceed with caution. I do not want to over-tax myself by being the old over-ambitious-and-keep-to-myself Elaine. Everytime I did that I broke down and couldn't even get out of bed to make or answer a phone call. I already owe so many apologies to so many people I have let down, and though I still will in future, I will try my best to do it right. Remembering always, what my doctor advises, and that is the simple truth that 'the joy of the Lord is my strength.' It is not only a spiritual concept but a medical one; anything that you enjoy you will find strength to do, anything you abhor will tire you out.
To end off, I just want to say that I have come to like pop-psychology magazine O mag, the magazine by Oprah Winfrey. It is such a good read, full of stuff that inspires and yet with pretty things to look at. It is only $14 but it makes you think, a lot. Plus it has lots of good book reviews, excellent for those like me who love to read. My staple magazines are now O mag and Vogue US, which I still insist upon for the art, culture, people and fashion. Much more worthy than local magazines. Enjoy reading.