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Sunday, September 20, 2009

animal Weltschmerz

Weltschmerz - it is starting to me again. I cannot help feeling sad over this particular dog.

Vietnam is one of originally many stray dogs in the construction site near the field opposite my house. We feed him on weekends when there is nobody there, and when we went yesterday, we found that all his family members and friends were gone, leaving only him. He was much skinnier than before, and had started to develop skin problems. J brought him back to our house for a bath and flea treatment.

I feel sad because we cannot keep him. Owning a dog properly means being able to afford his medical bills. Having him in the house is stressing out the cats, but that problem is solvable, given time. But Vietnam will definitely need to see a doctor if we want to keep him and give him a good life off the streets. If we put him back where we found him, he is at risk of being caught and put to sleep or abandoned somewhere even more desolate.

I am at a loss, and am disoriented too. I stare at him, looking at how tame and obedient he is - he has not pooed or peed in the house - and know in my heart he will make a good pet dog. I think he knows too, that we cannot keep him. He is extremely lonely, especially since his playmates from the site have all disappeared. He clings to J a lot. We bought medicine for his skin problem, and more food for him too.

The feeling I have about Vietnam's situation is how I feel when I cannot control my sadness and sympathy for lives that are hurt and lost around the world. In a way, having Vietnam in our lives makes me sad because I cannot help him much. I really wish I can do more for him.