Wednesday, May 23, 2007
I do not think I am much of a talker. There are times, like now, where I hardly feel like saying anything: no desire to update, vent, relate, just like a man in his Martian cave does.
In some ways I am a loner because I have my ultimate defences up, and like someone swimming underwater, I only release words like my breath in slow interrupted streams of bubbles. I make it to the end of the lap without coming above water.
In times like this I might still have energy to write as I do now. It requires less energy, it gives me more privacy, and I do not need to bulldoze my way across. No one will say I am shouting or being rude, and there will be no cutting in by any party of a conversation.
I like conversation. But I miss my old conversation partner and one of my best friends. Steps change, but dreams do not have to. It is one thing to share dreams to inspire someone, it is another share them and be understood.